I wrote this on Saturday, January 22.
Since last Sunday, Sue and I have realized that it’s time for us to redefine ministry in our lives. She asked me whether she participated enough in my ministry before. She shared that she didn’t have much time to participate in my ministry due to work. On top of regular meetings, it was hard for her to participate more, such as discipleship. And she implied that I didn’t have a strong tendency to co-work with her. (I think it’s kind of true.)
Now we don’t have those obligations to attend this or that meeting. We have more time and freedom to meet up with people on a personal level. As a couple, we both enjoy meeting different couples (e.g. pre-marital meeting). We can spend one to two hours to listen to them and to talk about our lives and struggles.. We realize that we are up to a life stage where marital (or couple) ministry is what we should focus on. How meaningful to build solid relationships with couples
I remember one night I shared with her, saying, “How powerful for a pastor to build solid relationships with different couples (e.g. ten) in ministry. In near/distance future, you have at least twenty people to co-work with you and develop ministry. Marital ministry is very important, etc….” In response, she said something like this: “Perhaps you shouldn’t always focus on developing ministry. Even though you talk about building lives or making disciples, you are basically talking about ministry. People is not as same as ministry. Perhaps it’s time for us to redefine our ministry at this point of life. It’s time for us to focus on relationship without developing ministry as the hidden motive. Especially now we don’t have a church context to develop ministry, etc…”
It makes me recall this verse: “Blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall see God” (Matt. 5:8). Only those who are pure in heart can see God. In order to see God in our relationships, I ought to be pure in heart. The desire to develop ministry adulterates my heart, blurs my vision, and distorts the images of others as God’s people. That desire turns “I-Thou” relation into “I-It” relation. Whenever you become something I utilize so that I can develop my ministry, you are no longer “Thou” but “It” in my heart. You are merely an object. I am the only subject in this relation. God never occurs in this kind of relationship, for He never treats us as an “It” even though we sometimes disobey, even rebel against, Him.
That's what it means when we say that God is a personal God. It’s in this person-to-person relation in which we experience mutuality, reciprocity, and symmetry. “Both partners retain their own subjectivity in the encounter, in which they become aware of the other person as a subject, rather than an object…An I-Thou relation involves the encounter of two mutually active subjects. It is the relationship…which is the real focus of personal interaction.”[1]
It’s scary how often time we practice “I-It” relation without even a sense of awareness. Or we’re aware, but who cares?
[1] Alister E. McGrath, Christian Theology: An Introduction. 2nd Edition (Oxford: Blackwell, 1997), p. 247.
No comments:
Post a Comment